Feeling alone in a room full of people…

Image from asinglepointofview.com

We hear it all the time and, most of the time, we’re surprised at who we hear it FROM. Someone who seems to have it all together. Someone who exudes confidence and popularity. Someone who you look up to because she seems like such an extrovert, so sociable, so… NOT like YOU. And then you wonder… Is she really how you imagine her to be? Or do you just see her that way? Can she play it off so well that you (and most people around her) are tricked into believing that that is who she is? Is it possible that her house is not perfect? That she is afraid to talk to you? That she is feeling just as lonely as you are?

But how can that be? She has everything! She has it all! You have much to be thankful for, but you don’t have all that she has! You’re the one that is lacking, NOT her! How could that be?

I’m not a blogger, but I’m a blog-follower. I love all kinds of blogs and in time I’ve come to LOVE mommy bloggers. It’s ironic, yes, but it’s true. I thoroughly enjoy reading about their lives, sharing their joys and crying along with them when things just don’t go as planned. This past week, when a lot of my favorites were off at Blogher, I was living vicariously through them. Reading their tweets, looking forward to their pictures and recap blog posts. Part of me DREAMS of going to NYC next year and just fan-girling myself to all of those women I admire. As I read their tweets, it was great to realize how alike we really are. It’s wonderful to learn that this world of social media has brought so many very lovely, awkward women the opportunity to share their common ground to the point where we stand together, where a group of us can meet and greet each other with that little “I know who you are!” squee and receive a hug back from someone just as surprised as you.

It’s lovely because it gives me hope.

I’ve felt lonely a long time, many times in a room full of (LOVING) people. I’ve relied (heavily) on my husband for the support that I just so desperately wanted. And then, one lonely night, I was playing around in an internet forum. Just playing in the background, trying to be invisible in a place I’d been to every day for years. But this night was different, different because a wonderful woman spoke to me and said “Why don’t you come out and play?”. After that? I met what would become my backbone and (I’m sure) a relief to my overburdened husband. I never participated heavily, but just their presence calmed me. SOMEONE understood me! How I felt, what I was going through, why I felt the way I felt… And, even better, it was not just one person, but a group of very versatile, fun, funny, snarky, beautiful women who filled my life with understanding. Yes, on the internet. Women I now call friends. Isn’t it odd?

Readingabout all the Blogher experiences just gives me hope. Because I DO count those women I’ve met as friends. Many people would disagree, I’m sure. To many, the idea of meeting like minds that you can call “friends” online is still taboo. But I’ve become a believer. The support and community that can be created online is priceless. At times when I’m drowning and it feels like NO ONE can understand me, those women bring me back. I’ve learned you can love someone you’ve never met. You can pray for her, for her child, cry for her, feel your heart swell with happiness and pride at their joyous moments, feel it swell with sorrow when they are going through rough times. And it is real. And it is friendship and community. Even when you’ve never seen her face to face or held her hand.

Family is a gift! It’s beautiful and wonderful and the unconditional love is healing.

Friendships built in such common ground are just as beautiful and just as healing and can be filled with just as much love.

So, in the wonderful world of social media… We can be all alone in a room and still feel surrounded by a community full of loving people.

2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. dipitie
    Aug 10, 2011 @ 18:04:34

    I ❤ you!!!!


  2. MrsO
    Aug 11, 2011 @ 14:22:07

    great post =)


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